lin's blog
medical student
having the time of my life!
Tuesday, November 30, 2004
LIBERATION!
yay! Alevels are over!
I've been quite havoc the past 2 days, apart from getting a bad bout of flu... but heck the fun still goes on!
yesterday, after bioS, met yun and sarah to shop for our prom dresses :) haha we went to every single clothing shop in far east, isetan scotts, taka, and tangs.. woah amazing. so freaking tiring but fun! i think i tried on a total of like 6 dresses b4 i found the one i liked... qt fast for me, since i tend to procrastinate like forever. yepz. a normal black tube dress, that's abit glittery :) yay.
then i watched incredibles w lawrence, and well yes, managed to jump (ie get a shock) twice. in a family oriented PG movie. whee! haha. tt's me, scaredy-cat! haha.. and then we went to borders and i got 3 books! reached home at like 10odd, before crashing into bed at midnight, and ended up chatting do dear di till almost 4 gah.. tired. haha.. cldnt wake up early enuff for my morning run so i'm all fat and flabby now hai...
and today, i met don in town to shop for his shirt... went to like so many places to find guys shirts haha... but qt fun and i think the one he chose was qt nice! and don!! what have u been telling ur parents about me? his dad came down to wisma to pay for his shirt cos got credit card discount.. and was giving me the HMM look, shook my hand and said, "so you're huilin, brandon has talked about you alot at home"... my response "..." haha... i'm the *ahem* fashion consultant! haha whee!
OHOHOH and i have brown highlights!
totally unnoticeable under dim light, but in the sun, its a nice streaky honey brown... :) yay my first time hair colouring, cost me $48, after checking with about 5 salons along orchard road haha... and after the treatment, i got a automated hair wash! like woah... u sit down in the chair that automatically moves up and puts u in position, and then the lady closes a lid over your forehead, and then water and air jets does the work.. not bad, quite relaxing and brain-stimulating there.. haha.
i feel like a taitai, spent so much money gah...like hundred odd in cash so far for shopping and hair and $70 tangs vouchers and about $60 borders vouchers. gosh. and still going to get shoes and accessories for gradnite tmr... grrr... but considering i havent actually been shopping since june, haha dunno... my parents qt happy to let me do all these, and even offered to pay for hair n dress, but i insisted on paying w my savings:)
lin~*
7:21 pm
Saturday, November 27, 2004
Ballet ~*
wow. today was my first ballet lesson in like ages.
and i can't dance!
whee! all the pirouettes, fouetes, adages, gissades and jetes, developes, frappes, etcetcetcetc. all messed up. my turn out is like partially gone, 5th position has somehow the ability to turn itself spontaneously to a 3rd position (which u use in grade 3 as opposed to like grade 8), my leg muscles have gone, and i do not have a ability to do 7 fouete turns at a shot (those damn pro many many million turns u see at the ballet where the dancer has the amazing ability to stay fixed on the spot), and double turns for every pirouette, which i used to be able to do, and can only do erratically now.
how did i pass grade 8 with honours? gosh. feel abit dui bu qi ms chew liddat.
but it was still a whole load of great fun!
u discover the fun in life when you can laugh at urself when the whole world's laughing at u, and when you have 2 other great frens screwing the exercise up together with you, it makes it even funner! it was amazing when we did on the spot releve pirouettes, and shihan n i would like gravitate towards each other, or like shihan and selene would like move towards me and i'm in the centre getting all squashed up and not daring to continue cos they'll crash into me... etcetcetc. and the entire class of ppl younger and pro-er than us laughing at how comical these 3 toots who cannot turn anymore are...
i think the only exercise i dint like mutilate at all was the very first stretching one, and that was like the easiest first barrework exercise. whee! hahahahahha.
fun! but mrs skipp's gonna take the class next yr and if i'm gonna learn from her, i better shape up or ship out. sheesh. haha or when she overcomes the initial "oh yay! huilin's back to learn ballet!" she'll be like "damn... why the hell did she bother to come back with this kinda lousy standard?" hahahaha and then she gets to scream at me like old times again. except, now, i wunt care cos no more exams and she wunt be able to make me cry anymore. muahahaha.
dinner with shihan at cafe cartel was great. my parents were there and they were SO NICE to bring my granny home first then head back again later to pick me up! gosh! and they paid for our dinner summore woah! amazed. i asked them if i can go out at night on mon, wed, err sat... etcetc and they were like "oh As over rite? do anyting u want!" im shocked and aghast. wow...
lin~*
10:10 pm
Thursday, November 25, 2004
rain!
its been raining incessantly on and off, on and off every single day at 6pm. just at the instant when i put on my shoes to get out of the house. hence i blame the rain for my lack of exercise these 3 days and the consequent horrible sense of feeling fat and obese. haiz. i can feel the pounds piling on... i need exercise. i need to run! i think i shall go run tmr in the morning before chemS in the afternoon.
at least 3/4s of the 1986 babies in S'pore are officially released from the shackles and gloom of the Alevels. another lot will be free tmr. then it will finally be my turn!!! yay!!! yay!!! ahh.
spapers left. i have 20hrs to shape up my chemS when i havent touched it in ages. ahhhhh. i want to not have exams anymore!!
today i had a bad hair day, two papers and spent an utterly enjoyable inbetween time with huiling, chatting, crapping about everything yet nothing in particular. slack tho. heh. heck larh. i have a very happening week next week :) yay! now exams just end soon.. like SOON... like NOW... argh... :(
this is depressing. cried myself to sleep the other day and i still dunno y hai
lin~*
6:07 pm
Wednesday, November 24, 2004
ballet!
an update on the mosquito situation: they penetrated my armour. *scratch* *sob*
i'm going back to ballet this saturday! finally! after 2.5 yrs! with shihan and selene! yay!
yepz took alot of time persuading my parents to let me go since it falls on our usual saturday family dinner night. but since our family dinner consists of 4 ppl, i cldn't see y they were so adamant about not going out another day. hai
then, just for fun, i went to put on my leotard and tights, which were put away for 2.5 yrs since grade8 exams in sec4... woah haha.. gosh i've really changed since.
the posture tt mrs skipp cultivated over 12 yrs disappeared has gone esp with the hunching over studying for Os and As...
and i've definitely grown alot fatter =( unsightly lumps on all the wrong places and none at the right places hai hahahahaha
then i tried standing in the normal first position in centre, chin lifted, shoulders back, tuck in ribs, tuck in tummy, squeeze butt in, turn out feet... and gosh it was damn freaking tiring. and i used to stand like that subconsciously. gosh. i think can burn calories just standing liddat. cannot make it liao. my muscles gone to waste.
oh wellz.. gotta get back in shape. hai.
on a brighter note, phys p3's over! yay! now there's just biop1, physp5, chem n bio S, and i'll be FREE from these shackles! i want a life. gimme back my life.
lots to look forward to after As... after monday.. shopping w frens, 23rd farewell, holidays, dance, sleep, eat, READ!, relatives coming over... etcetcetc. yay! that's for dec.
parents thinking of going to nepal this dec. I WANT!!! instead of msia that is... i'm gonna try psycho my dad to let us go trekking at the Himalayas... woohoo! but this idea isnt v likely to happen now cos its apparently v cold now. ohwellz. maybe in spring! then got flowers yay!
lin~*
11:48 am
Monday, November 22, 2004
mosquitoes. GAH.
weather lately's been really nice, cool, rainy, and windy. the downside of it all is that its good for me and running and mugging and sleeping, but also perfect breeding conditions for mosquitoes. and there apparently seems to be a new breed that's really common lately which i've never quite seen before. when they bite, they leave a real tiny mosquito bite bump, that's maybe 10 times smaller than the usual type, but also 10 times, no make that a thousand times more itchy. and i've got about 50 of such bites on each leg plus like 10 on my arms and everywhere else.
freaking irritating.
e.g: in wine production, *scratch* first the grapes *scratch*are put into a crusher *scratchscratch*, where the must is separated *scratch* from the stems *scratchscratchscratch*. gah i give up.
im wearing armour tonight. long pants, big huge shirt, and a long sleeve jacket around the house. dad's super amused cos he's sitting around in tshirt and shorts. and i look very cold apparently.
only face, feet and hands exposed. if they attack any of these areas, i'm declaring all out war.
the mosquitoes in my room and the council room are huge and fat already. from MY blood. GAH. why are some people so lucky tt mosquitoes just keep at bay from them? wenkien and john told lingli, who's having the same problem as me, that salty blood attracts mosquitoes. im sure. bert's theory is that smart people's blood attracts mosquitoes. im sure too. haha lousy theories. im just attractive larh right. to the wrong organisms unfortunately.
lin~*
8:36 pm
Saturday, November 20, 2004
are you tumb?
hahahah. just played this 'are you dumb' game online. its so freaking farnee!! the guy's hongkong english makes it sound like 'are you TUMB'? simple principle: ans 3 qns and if you get all 3 correct, you are not 'TUMB" but if you dont, you are 'TUMB", you are "LOSER" tt's exactly how the guy says it. gosh. hahahaha i have a tummyache from laughing now. :)
went town today. felt like the only j2 slacker around town. woohoo! haha. went on the pretext of seeing my jrs dance, but in reality cos i cldn't stand my house anymore. then go.. mug in lib for awhile, lunch w parents, met lawrence, whom very kindly offered to go see hot babes and chiobus with me... (there now you can't complain i scold u on my blog. hee. oh btw, he's a very available and eligible bachelor k want his no, jus ask me, i'll give gladly!) and then go all the way, they refused to dance for me. hai. and sherry refused to do her ultra flexible leg over the head thingey again for me to see for what may be the last time. hai.
walking into tangs was like getting slammed in the face by a bus. apart from their new decor, it made me realise i havent been shopping in almost 4mths now! ever since after ct2!!! ahhh! 9 more days... then woohooohoo! orchard! here i come! muahaha. haha.
studying for As really really sucks. haiz. 9 more days onli! will i last till then? will i will i?
lin~*
9:17 pm
Friday, November 19, 2004
its friiiday!!
muahahaha! friday's here at last! which means its 10 days to end of Alevels!!! yayhoo!
its been raining all evening haiz. dint get to have my canalroute/ecp run today :( sad. but got to sleep for like 2hrs before my granny woke me up for dinner. wah haha never seen her so candid before heh. i think she was really amused to see me sleeping. dunno y haha.
i want to eat lavanderhoney gelato!!! haha suddenly missed it. had it all of one and a half times at bellagio's at hollandv before it closed down. it was this experimental flavour there that i happened to stumble across one evening. loved it SO MUCH tt i went back w a fren for more the next wkend but vv little left and the shoplady was so nice to give it to me for free if i got another scoop. wah! sad that it closed down. *sob* it was a nice quiet cafe to go to. next favouritest gelato flavour is the butterpecan one i had at this other gelato place in bkt timah. buttery icecreams are really nice! :) yayy.
sly is in the finals?!? can't believe it. gosh. his teenybopper fans really came through huh.
lin~*
9:50 pm
Thursday, November 18, 2004
once you pop, you can't stop!
yay physics 1 and 2 over too! :) now i really really REALLY can't wait for 29th nov when it'll really be all over :)
i think running and pringles are so alike. tho one uses up calories and the other piles it on (shudders to think about how much weight i put on eating them last time, used to love them!) heh, once i start running, i can't stop! muahahaha. today ran for about 1hr10min...to eastcoast, past the food centre, the lagoon... and met weikeong and david who were cycling there. then i was thinking about how i used to only run like 1km and would feel very happy liao haha. and now barely satisfied with 4km..woohoo. so interesting.
going to dance in selene's church's xmas celebrations with her at taka in dec. so exciting!!! wow haha..havent danced in so long tho..*jittery* haiz scary.. hee.
lin~*
7:28 pm
Tuesday, November 16, 2004
no more p&c!!! EVER!!
yay. the last p&c qn of my life is over!! i hate p&c btw... can't say that it was easy (the p&c qn) but well. heck. at least i think i got the same answers as selene... (tho each of the ans are 6-7 digits so dunt know for sure exactly.. i suck at remembering numbers bleargh) and her maths is good. so tt's saying sthg. whee! =) but overall, the stats part was kinda harder than expected. got slightly stuck on one qn. the fabled QN27 tt everyone was talking about after the paper that was weird. but oh wellz. think i did alright larh.
no more maths forever!
almost got into an accident on the way home.. when the car in front of us stopped suddenly and hit the car in front of it.. aunty ks's car almost hit the car in front of her and another truck almost hit us frm the back.. i think both ways missed by like what.. 1inch? haha woohoo. phew. complicated but yeah. poor 2 cars in front of us that got into a slight 'you scratched my car so you must pay for my repair/repainting fees' accident tho.
lesson of the day= to all driver learners never drive too close to the car in front of you.
had maggi mee for lunch *scrunches up nose*, shall go study chem for tmr.. then run (oh no its thundering.. grr dunt rain pls dun rain...)
lin~*
1:39 pm
Monday, November 15, 2004
GAH.
hai. dint manage to study much last night... lay in bed cramping and trying to read physics notes. finished all of 3 chapts (that is chapt1, 2, and 3.. which is like nothing) before i dozed off and woke up when lawrence msged me at 2. w the phone vibrating in my ear. GAH.
and there's maths paper2 tmr. i somehow have to muster up the resolve and stamina to study and make sure i do okay for it. GAH again.
long breaks dont do you much good. they put u in a lull where you momentarily believe that you dont actually have to study for a long time yet... and so you slack the whole stretch away. SO... i have my doubts on how my alevel results will turn out. GAH. this is dumb. work so freaking hard for so many years only to waste it all away now. sad right. hai. i used to mug >10hrs a day. now? haha i'd be lucky if i even make 5. bleah.
brendan (my selffar) is telling me about his upcoming trip to India where he'll be climbing the himalayas, doing cip and stuff liddat. ENVIOUS. and baorong will be going to obs korea in dec/jan too! ENVIOUS again. wanted to sign up for obs korea, cos its a winter expedition etc.. but WELL, cldn't to spare the two thousand bucks it costs. so yarh. stay in hot sunny singapore, maybe spend a wk or two in penang, maybe go somewhere w parents etcetc. hai and we were supposed to go skiing in vancouver. i miss skiing, even tho the most i've been is the baby-intermediate slopes in austria and salt lake city. but its nice all the same.
oh anyone wants to go penang w me? free accomodation at my penang ahma's place (traditional nonya housing) or aunts' place (condo/bungalow/terrace hse.. take your pick). haha..
lin~*
1:35 pm
Sunday, November 14, 2004
never gonna leave your side...~*
I feel like a song without the words,
a man without a soul,
a bird without its wings,
a heart without a home.
I feel like a knight without a sword,
a sky without the sun, cause you are the one.
I feel like a ship beneath the waves,
a child who's lost its way,
a door without a key,
a face without a name.
I feel like a breath without the air,
and everyday's the same, since you've gone away.
~ Never Gonna Leave Your Side, Daniel Bedingfield
so many ways to describe how incomplete you feel when someone you love isn't with you...
lin~*
11:48 am
today.
hmm today was an interesting day.
got woken up by my maid at 930 with an amazingly heavy breakfast. egg sandwich and all the cocktail sandwiches she could find in the fridge. gosh i don't know where she got the idea i had such a large stomach capacity. so anw, i downed the whole thing to please her, and ate like 2 strands of kuay teow for lunch hahaha.
Seriously, i think i have a low tolerance level for food. put anything in front of me, and the likelihood of seeing the plate clean in a short while's time is quite high. haiz no wonder im getting fat. in sec sch, i had this maid who could cook really really well. pizzas, pies, cakes, whatnot... and i realised that although i grew only 6cm since sec1, i put on just about 10kg since. haiz. i was only 49 in sec1!!! madness. thank goodness i lost some weight recently.
but yes, i digress. apart from the short episode of feeling sad, stressed, distressed, fat and ugly in the afternoon, which was followed by a long run that made me feel loads better... the rest of the day was pretty much alright. watched how to lose a guy in 10days on hbo, that was interrupted by selene calling and both of us chatting about post As, shopping, prom, and other rubbish liddat. it was great to talk to her again. i was beginning to think i'd lost a friend already, what with her always being with hweeying and zh lately, and everything.. but i guess some things u just can't lose. sel's been like my 'sister' since we were tots. haha. so anw, i didnt quite learn how to lose a guy in 10days, cos our phone call lasted the entire exact duration of the 'how girls disgust guys' part. and all i got to see was the sweet, lovey dovey part. not that i minded tho, haha. shows like these never fail to infuse u with blissful thoughts of love and possibility. then of course, harsh reality sets in... inevitably.
this came in the form of a sex and the city episode AFTER the movie, which completely threw apart the perfect, ideal notions of love and whatever. haha.
and well as u can probably see, i did very little work today. just 2 lousy chem paper2s, about to start on my third. argh.
this sucks. i'm completely too slack. i need a slap, a smack and a reality check. (HOWEVER, i do not need a swim in the sea, however much u'd like to help me with tt... *smack*)
alevels might be ending in all of 15 days from this second, but till then, whether i fail miserably or get my 4As is still a huge question mark.
sad reality.
study time.
lin~*
12:15 am
Thursday, November 11, 2004
pure agony...
pure agony is... when you walk into borders, see SO many books you really really want to read, but don't allow yourself to get any, even though you've got about $120 worth of vouchers from there. argh. at least i managed to get out from the house.
after As, i'm so going to spend an entire afternoon at the library and at borders, just browsing and basking in pure happiness. ahhh... i want to read. :( read anything other than Alevel texts...
lin~*
8:46 pm
argh.
argh! i want to go out! staying at home, cooping up, facing an endless parade of notes, tyses, prelim papers etc, is making me go crazy! grrrrrr.... even running doesnt help. *cries*
lin~*
1:50 am
poetry
i've never quite been one to read poetry, though i definitely enjoy them... don, rem how u used to 'test' my interpretations on cheem poetry and i'd nv be too far off even tho i've not touched lit for maybe 4yrs now? haha...
but was browsing through the collected works of emily dickinson's poetry, and i realised how pertinent they were to life. they put down what i think inside, what i'm not capable of describing properly, in writing. in fluid, poised english. its amazing how u can relate to poetry someone wrote in the 1920s. its so... ancient. yet pertinent.
maybe that's why people enjoy song lyrics.. after all its a popularised version of traditional poetry..
lin~*
1:11 am
Pain...
PAIN has an element of blank;
It cannot recollect
When it began, or if there were
A day when it was not.
It has no future but itself,
Its infinite realms contain
Its past, enlightened to perceive
New periods of pain.
lin~*
1:06 am
Daily bliss...
I HAD a daily bliss
I half indifferent viewed,
Till sudden I perceived it stir,—
It grew as I pursued,
Till when, around a crag,
It wasted from my sight,
Enlarged beyond my utmost scope,
I learned its sweetness right.
lin~*
1:04 am
Wednesday, November 10, 2004
...
I don't know you anymore
I don't recognize this place
The picture frames have changed and so has your name
We don't talk much anymore
We keep running from the pain
But what I wouldn't give to see your face again
~ I Don't Know You Anymore, Savage Garden
lin~*
10:53 pm
haiz.
my dream of doing med in cambridge is slowly fading away to the back of my mind, to be packed all over with cobwebs, and stored lovingly in the recesses and depths of my cranial folds... just as my dream of studying anything in us did...
i really want to.
but its totally unpractical to.
for the 6yr course in uk (anywhere, not necessarily cam), my poor parents have to fork out about half a million bucks. imagine what else they can get with that money if they dunt send their snooty kid to the uk. in s'pore, nus, (assumng i manage to get in somehow..), all they'd have to pay is about 80k. 80k vs 500k, and u get the mbbs degree just the same. not to mention all the other benefits studying med local, like all the contacts u'll establish, and a more thorough understanding of med in the local context. haiz.
been nursing dreams of studying overseas since like forever.. and now that i'm like almost there... its so close, i could really actually go if i really wanted to... i realise that my ambition doesnt quite correlate with this dream in reality.
haiz. the way it looks, i'll be stuck here in sunny singapore, with the chicken rice, curry chicken and whatnot, right with my darling parents and granny, for the next 6yrs.
HAIZ.
k larh, its not so bad larh. sheesh.
as a bribe to make me stay, my parents offered to let me stay in my own apartment.
and i have a pimple on the worst possible spot ever. right in the centre of my nose. it popped out inadvertantly just before math yesterday. SO WEIRD! yuckyuckyuck.
cortisol levels please come down. pleasepleaseplease? or i'm going to get rid of you anyway in 3weeks time..
lin~*
11:26 am
Tuesday, November 09, 2004
You know when you're stresesd when...
You know you're stressed when...
1. You have bad hair that won't stay on your head.
2. It snows when you brush your hair. (dandruff larh toot)
3. You get spotty, pimply bad skin.
4. You havent been to the toilet in ages.
5. The person behind you during Math paper can't help but stare at that obvious strand of white hair on your head.
6. You can't sleep.
7. Your face looks like it belongs to a pufferfish.
8. Your eyes can't be seen behind the dark rings around it.
9. You silhouette looks more like it belongs to the Hunchback of Notre Dame
10. You know you're stressed when you know you're stressed.
Ok. that's totally me. woohoo. I'm stressed :) yay. it was kaiwei who saw my white hair btw, and promptly plucked it off for me once the invigilator said we could go hehe.
yay the marathon papers chem p3, math p1 and bio p2 are finally over. papers were ok. can't say i did as well as i shld have for bio p2 tho, was so tired i couldn't think hai. had to down a whole glass of stall 1 auntie's esp bitter black coffee (she was sympathetic when i told her... hee) before i could keep my eyes open for math. looking forward to the 6day break ahead of me. can study at a more relaxed pace and sleep more.
3 more weeks. yay!
lin~*
7:15 pm
Monday, November 08, 2004
=)
in the midst of my 1hr dinner break, blogging, and feeding my grandma her birthday cake...secret recipe's chocobanana cake.. she loves the thick banana slices and so do i :)
i've got 3hrs to totally finish mugging bio. *gasps* haiz shldn't have spent the whole afternoon on math, but ohwellz.
read a chapt from 'women are from venus and men are from mars' during lunch and gained an interesting insight:
women get depressed because they don't feel cherished.
men get depressed because they don't feel needed.
hmm. quite true. interesting book. shall finish it after As.
lin~*
7:55 pm
Sunday, November 07, 2004
anxiety attack...
gosh. i feel so unprepared for tmr and tues! and these are 3 vv impt papers!!! ahhh... its horrendous. like WHAT IF (i screw up???) that would be so UNTHINKABLE. argh. Last chem paper3, math paper1 and bio paper2 of my life. so interesting if i screw these up. *sobs* haiz.
lin~*
4:15 pm
Thursday, November 04, 2004
i want to watch a movie!
Haiz. haha yes. i want to watch a movie. i want to watch princess diaries! it looks so cute funny and sweet!
but cannot. must study...
haha. my predictions for the final 3 in idol: olinda, taufik, sly. the next to go: leandra, then daphne. lets see if that comes true :) final 2: have no idea. i think sly wld go, but he's so hugely popular. dunno. the singapore idol: i really dunno. tough choice there.
anw, i'm going to be switching my phone off for most of the day from now unless im out, so in case i dunt reply smses or calls or sthg, yepz sorry. As more impt :( 1 more month of this misery haiz.
slept this afternoon with the lull of the pouring rain. so nice to sleep heh. and i saw a woodpecker whilst jogging today. it was pecking above me... peck peck peck.. i was so scared the branch would drop on my head so i ran faster. happened before whilst i was walking home a few wks ago, this branch dropped right on my head. it hurt btw... how lucky rite haha...
oh and if you meet a lecher on the bus, please get up and walk away. dont sit there stupidly like me for 2stops till ur stop comes.
lin~*
8:59 pm
Wednesday, November 03, 2004
a confession ~*
ok this should have happened a long time ago... but anw here goes..
I'M SCARED FOR ALEVELS!
there.
lin~*
1:04 am
Tuesday, November 02, 2004
education
whilst looking at overused quotes to pepper my gp essays with, i came across this one: "Education is a state-controlled manufactory of echoes."
This immediately reminded me of how we just need to regurgitate key words, phrases, crap like that for all our structured/essay answers. However much THEY claim that it isn't true, it is.
Even good gp students tend not to do so well for compre; my tutor said so... instead of demanding proper comprehension from candidates, which would involve taking in the passage stuff, assimilating it, then saying it in a comprehended way, we just have to pick out the points from the passage, somehow rephrase it, then plonk it right down in the line spaces. Not that i'm complaining, it actually helps me do better since i'm not one of those 'pro gp students'
Even for long ago-trussed into the back of my mind social studies, we could never write anything that criticised the govt policies beyond what the textbook said, cos we wldnt do well.
so maybe in this sense, if this is true: "It is possible to store the mind with a million facts and still be entirely uneducated", heck all the As i've ever gotten. I'm still an uneducated country bumpkin. wow.
lin~*
11:14 pm
